Close Friends

When we are close friends with someone, we intuitively know when they need a hug, a helping hand, or a sympathetic ear. Likewise, when we are going through bleak periods in our lives, we count on friends to support us through loss, illness, and other setbacks, both big and small. And while part of being a good friend means being there when the other person needs us, it is just as important to be there for our friends so we can share in their joyous celebrations and triumphs.

After all, who else would our friends want to celebrate their promotions, graduations, marriages, and good news with than their loved ones and good friends? Yet depending on what is happening in our lives, it can sometimes be difficult to be there for our friends during the good times. We can become so busy with our own lives that we forget to make time. Or, we may be so focused on our own problems that we may not feel like celebrating with our friends. We may even take their joyful moments for granted, assuming that as long as we’re there for our friends during the bad times that we are doing our jobs. Yet part of being a true friend means also being there during the good times. Success and happiness can feel empty without someone to share them with, and who better to join in our victory dances than our good friends.

Taking the time from our busy lives to honor our friends’ happy moments is a wonderful way to show them that they matter. And in many ways, by wanting you around during their happy occasions, your friends are also honoring you. After all, it is the people we cherish that we want around us to sing at our birthdays, visit our newborn babies, and pop open that bottle of champagne with when we reach a milestone moment. The next time a friend wants you to be there to celebrate with them, remember to feel honored that they thought of asking you. Together, you can celebrate their happiness and your rich friendship.

Something to share:

Tan Jing Ming, my old pal, wrote his comment in my other blog (I Hope You Sing – You’ve Got A Friend): “Close friends are usually childhood friends where we have been friends for many years during our younger days and shared a lot fun together.” Yes. Close friends are our intimate friends. They are also our lifelong friends since childhood. We used to spend most of the time together after school; having fun together in various outdoor games and activities. Thus our relationship got closer day by day as we grew up in our hometown. But sad to say that only few in number remained keeping in touch as we have separated from each other and settled down in different places. The relationship somehow seems to be drifted apart as time goes by.

On the other hand, we do get close to some of our colleagues in our workplace and later become intimate friends. But most of them remain as casual friends. Our other casual friends also include our neighbors, our club members, our church members, parents of our children, friends of our colleagues and co-workers, and people we used to come across every now and then in our everyday lives. These are new and old acquaintances that we bump into and whenever we come across each other we used to nod our heads and say “Hello” without close fellowship. So the relationship remains casual.

There is no excuse for not having time for our friends who are staying in the same town or city. There is also no reason why we can’t meet up a friend when he happens to be in town. The Chinese saying puts it very clearly, “Is it not a joy to have friends come from afar?” 有朋友自远方来，不亦乐呼？(You Peng You Zi Yen Fang Lai, Bu Yi Le Hu) No mater how busy we are, we must always be ready to give our good friends our time. Yes. It will be a joyful moment to meet up and spend time with friends coming from other places. Our time is not only the precious gift that we can give, but also the top priority that we should make ourselves available for friends. When we are invited by our friends to attend their special functions, I am sure our presence will be much felt, honored and greatly appreciated by them.

I feel bad when I couldn’t attend the wedding of Lim Keng Hian’s son in Kuala Lumpur in May 2008 as I was told all of a sudden to make a trip to Acheh on the wedding date. Actually I felt honored of his invitation and I really wanted to share the happy moments with him and his family. Moreover, I was expecting to meet some of our old friends and ex-colleagues whom we had not met for quite a number of years at the wedding dinner. I am sure they were invited too.

As I plan to retire soon, I think I will not have any more excuses but the time to attend any invitation of my friends in near future. I will be a much happier person from now on to share the joyfulness of my close friends who have added richness to my life.