Do you have time for your family?
A young man learns what's most important in life from the guy next door.
It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.
Over the phone, his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday."
Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days.
"Jack, did you hear me?"
"Oh sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him.
I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said.
"Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him.
"I loved that old house he lived in," Jack said.
"You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life," she said.
"He's the one who taught me carpentry," he said. "I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important...Mom, I'll be there for the funeral," Jack said.
As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away.
Jack and his Mom stopped by to see the old house next door one more time on the night before he returned home. Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for a moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through space and time. The house was exactly as he remembered. Every step held memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture....Jack stopped suddenly.
"What's wrong, Jack?" his Mom asked.
"The box is gone," he said.
"What box?" Mom asked.
"There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was the thing I value most," Jack said. It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it.
"Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him," Jack said. "I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom."
It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died. Returning home from work one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox. "Signature required on a package. There was no one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days," the note read.
Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention. "Mr. Harold Belser" it read.
Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside. "Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I valued most in my life."
A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as tears filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked the box. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch. Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover.
Inside he found these words engraved: "Jack Thanks for your time! - Harold Belser. "
"The thing he valued most...was...my time," Jack murmured to himself. He held the watch for a few minutes then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. "Why?" Janet, his assistant asked.
"I need some time to spend with my son," he said. "Oh, by the way, Janet... thanks for your time!"
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away,"
Something to share:
The so-called “Occupational Hazard” is quite true for planters who work in plantations far away from towns. When our children are below school-going age, they can stay with us in the plantations. That's the time we can be with our wife and our children most of the time. However, when our children started going to schools, most of us have to station our families in towns. We can only have time for our families during weekends, public holidays and during our annual leave. The question is, “Do we spend more time with them when we have the time?”
Whenever I think back of the past memories, I do regret that I did not spend much time with my children when they were young even though I had the time to do so. When they have grown up, they have their own circle of friends, colleagues, and even their own families, and then they will have very little time for their parents.
Now it looks like that I can only spend time with them through sms. Consider lucky when they make a call once in a blue moon. My friends, are you feeling the same way as I do? Or do you have to travel long distance to visit your grown up children in far away towns?
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3 comments:
Dear KP,
Yes, I agree with your Quality Time article. It's very appropriate esp. nowadays. People are always busy chasing after the mighty Ringgit. People have no time for family and friends. Time is money they say. But money cannot buy you time. Time lost is lost forever! We have no time machine to go back in time. Only H.G.Wells can do it in his best selling book about man making a Time Machine to go to the past or future. Or you can go to the movies to fantacise your dreams. But in reality, we cannot fight Father Time. We have to grow old, whether we like it or not. It's either we grow old gracefully and happily or otherwise. So you see, we have to plan for our retirement
according to our needs. Don't indulge in overspending unnecessarily when you are earning
good money. Want not. waste not. I don't mean one should be a miser and stingy, but spend wisely and don't indulge in too luxurious lifestyle. If a Myvi or a Proton is good enough, don't go for a Merc. or a Toyota Campri. Cut your clothe according to the cloth you have. Of Course, if one is a millionaire, one can afford the all the luxuries. One man's meat is another's poison. Don't always look at your neighbour's house and compare. The grass is always greener on the other side. Do things which make u happy.
Yes, we must have time with our family and friends. Don't say u have no time for your family and friends. Only people who only think of making money all the time say that.
I remember I used to visit my son every fortnight when he was studying Form Six in Sam Tet Sec. School in Ipoh 5 years ago to give him moral support. I was working in GMI, KL at that time. I used to rush to Puduraya and catch the earliest bus to Ipoh and rush back to KL on Mornday morning. The following weekend, I rushed again to Puduraya to catch a bus to Lipis to visit my family. When my son was in USM doing his Medical Studies, I used to take a train to the USM Health Campus in Kubang Krian K'tan every now and then. My wife and I also attended our three childrens' graduation in USM,Penang and UTM,Skudai. This Wed. we are going to Penang to attend my eldest daughter's garduation in USM - Masters degree in Computer Science. It's a 7 hours drive from K.Lpis to Penang. It's v. tiring for a retiree like me, but then it's a labour of love, my friend.
Thanks for the good article. I feel proud and lucky to be with my family until year 2000. If not because of of the problem with the top management in my previous company, I think I will rot there with a small pay. But I will be very happy living together with my family.
Since I joint IOI in 1989, my first posting was Pukin, then Triang Esate. In 1994 I left Sabai to join a small China Man company in Karak. It took me 3 sleepless night to decide whether to go or not. At last, we ( my wife and I) made the right decission.
When my kids were small back in 1994. I will bring them upstairs at 8.30 pm then start reading story books to them. My wife will sent them to school and I will pick them up from school. My daughter used to invite her friends to our estate bangalow to have BBQ. I hardly have time for myself or for friends. Today I feel very happy and my kids treated me as their friends and also his respected father.
I left my job with Sg Pertang Estate 31/8/2000, my former bosses like Robert Khoo, Lim Cheong Chai and other friends told me offers were there in Indonesia and Sabah. Luckly my wife supported me to stay back in Semunanjung M'sia.
Remember immediately after Chinese new year in 2001, I went for interview in JB. My daughter discouraged me to go as the job will be for Kuala Lipis. I told her that I just give it a try, not necessary I will be offered. She felt sad but before I left for the interview, she passed me a sweater and remind me to wear in the the bus. Do you know, she secretly hand made a well wish card and hide it in the cloth. This is rarely touching and I am crying now when I write this few sentenses and think of this touching incidence.
Today our efforts are not wasted, my kids are doing well with their studies and there are very close to me. Although I am away in Gua Musang, I make it an effort to give them a call every night to chart and check on their progress. So friend communication is 2 way, Start to communicate and be a proud father.
Mother Teresa,” Love begins at home; love lives in homes.”
In other words, she reminded us that parent must have time for children and children must have more time with parents especially when they are aging.
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